#( knowing our health care system it might take the whole year )

[piritos03]

Got an email that my hourly wage has been raised by 7 whole ass percent LMAO

The average food inflation last year was around 40-50%. Proof:

[uboat53]

I had a few thoughts about the recent murder (targeted killing? assassination?) of the United Health Care CEO recently. I'll start with the most immediately related which is…

THE OBVIOUS

I think that this was an immoral act and I oppose it. The taking of human life is always wrong and it should only be done as a last resort to prevent even greater harm. This killing will not change United Healthcare's policies at all, whoever replaces him will likely follow exactly the same policies.

Whenever (and if) this person is found, they will be tried for their crime and, if convicted, punished for it, and I think that all of that is entirely reasonable.

With that said, we've spoken about the morality of the person who killed Mr. Thompson, but that's not the whole story because…

THE VICTIM

Mr. Thompson himself is hardly a beacon of morality. United Healthcare is widely regarded as one of the most vicious health insurance companies in terms of denying care in order to contain expenses at great human cost. Many doctors have recently been asked to estimate how many lost person-years of life UHC is responsible for and the lowest estimate I've seen runs into the millions.

Mr. Thompson was not UHC, but he was its CEO. He may not have personally denied a single claim, but he is responsible for creating and maintaining the system that has denied millions of them. He knew what the system he oversaw did and he took no action to stop it. He knew that the incentives he put in place and the training that he approved were leading his employees to turn down thousands of necessary medical requests each month and did nothing. He knew that the AI tool whose implementation he approved and oversaw had an error rate of up to 90%, resulting in even more necessary medical requests being denied, but he did nothing.

Again, none of this justifies murder, but anyone would be justified in questioning whether some punishment was necessary and what it says about our system that it was unable to deliver any. The reason for that is…

THE CORPORATE EFFECT

Has anyone else noticed that making a crime corporate lets you get away with it? If I dump thousands of gallons of toxic chemicals into a river in order to save a few bucks, I'm probably going to go to jail for a long time and be charged a fine that might take me the rest of my life to pay off if I ever do. On the other hand, if a person working for a corporation dumps thousands of gallons of toxic chemicals into a river to save a few bucks, the odds of them going to jail are extremely low and the corporation itself will probably end up paying a fairly small fine, probably less than what they saved by dumping in the first place.

Corporate crime provides a diffusion of responsibility. The person doing the dumping is probably part of a group and each person in the group probably played some small part in the dumping. The group that did the dumping is responsible to a manager who did not personally do the dumping and may not have explicitly approved it, and that manager is responsible to an even higher manager with an even more abstract responsibility over specific actions.

Which one of those people is responsible for the crime? Well, in a direct, legal sense, none of them, but in a very real sense, all of them. In this way, corporations function a lot like organized crime families where lower level individuals perform the actual crime and insulate higher level individuals from the legal consequences thereof except that, in the corporate structure, the responsibility for the action is diffused so far that even the lower level individuals are often protected from the consequences.

THE RESULTS

Look, it's not mysterious, we know what happens in these cases. There's a ton of good research out there detailing what happens in communities that are both under-policed and over-policed, and this is a case that is both under-policed (corporate criminals not being held accountable) and over-policed (those who cross corporations being prosecuted to the full extent of the law). These kinds of situations lead to vigilante action and if that vigilante action persists for long enough, those committing it coalesce into gangs which are even more capable of vigilante action than individuals are.

If the underlying problems remain unaddressed for too long and the police focus on the gangs instead of on the crimes themselves, conflict eventually develops directly between the vigilantes (gangs) and law enforcement.

There's also a long history in this in terms of class economics as well. We have a sort of romantic view of the Progressive Era in terms of how worker's rights were achieved and, while they were achieved partly through peaceful political effort, they also came about due to a surge of violence against the capital and managerial classes. The weekend and the 40-hour work week were not just magnanimously given to workers, partially they came about by convincing those in power of the humanity of these efforts, but partially they also came about because desperate workers were burning the houses of their bosses, sometimes even killing them, and some level of worker's rights seemed a worthwhile compromise in comparison.

In other words, this state of events is lamentable, but also predictable. The eventual solution is pretty predictable as well; something is going to have to give. If the Progressive Era is anything to go off of, there is only so much cracking down that can be done, so it's likely that we will eventually see at least some shifting of power from corporations back to individuals, i.e., from capital back toward labor.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Look, what the shooter did was wrong and he can and should shoulder the consequences of that, but we can't simply take the action in isolation. What Mr. Thompson did was also wrong, and likely far more wrong than just the killing of a single individual, just not in a way that our legal system has been built to address, and when wrongdoing persists in a way that our justice system is incapable of addressing, vigilante actions are inevitable.

When people say that they are conflicted about the morality of this particular act (or, as much of the internet is doing, celebrating it), this is what they mean. Just because the shooter's actions are morally wrong doesn't mean they aren't understandable. Unfortunately, until our system adjusts to be capable of addressing morally repugnant behavior like Mr. Thompson's, it's likely that more individuals will feel the need to take justice into their own hands in the future.

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved in our archive

LOUISE RAW speaks to Long Covid sufferer Sam Williams and others who feel let down by a state that ignores their debilitating illness

ON NOVEMBER 29 this year, a groundbreaking study by German research centre Helmholtz Munich and Munchen University was published.

It seems to confirm beyond doubt that the condition we call Long Covid (LC) is “real” — physiological, as opposed to psychological.

The long-lasting brain effects many sufferers have reported may finally be explained by its findings — that the SARS-CoV-2 spike protein remains in the brain’s protective layers and the bone marrow of the skull, for up to four years after infection.

This, researcher say, may trigger chronic inflammation, and an increased risk of neurodegenerative disease.

You could almost hear the Long Covid community’s weary, collective “We told you so!”

It’s been a long and draining few years for them, as sufferer and activist Sam Williams told me recently when I spoke to him about the hand-grenade LC had lobbed into his and his family’s lives.

Sam says he feels as if he’s in mourning for the life he had before — and, in 2019, it was a good one.

Sam was a fit and healthy husband and father, probably fitter than most men in their forties, with a very active lifestyle, including running marathons.

Now, he describes himself as “completely broken.”

Sam has lost not just the everyday things — the ability to work and to drive — but much of the fun of life, too. Family bike rides, camping trips and long walks with the dogs are now a thing of the past.

Sam can’t relax with a drink, because alcohol makes his symptoms worse; and, he says, has rarely been able to be sexually intimate with his wife since becoming ill, which has naturally affected their relationship.

Sam’s wife has had to take on a higher-paid job to cover bills, and to take over far more household chores. “It’s like a whole new relationship,” Sam says. He feels guilty about this, and although he knows, logically, it’s not his fault, that doesn’t stop the self-blame. At times, he tells me he’s felt hopeless, and even suicidal.

It’s incredible how we ignore the growing group of people enduring similar experiences. It is also partly because we ignore it that the LC community continues to grow. Fresh infections occur as people eschew masks and other simple mitigations; so new cases of Long Covid develop, and older ones are worsened by repeat infections.

Currently more than two million people in the UK say they’re suffering the effects of Long Covid, and the vast majority — 1.5 million — find their everyday lives impacted.

An astonishing one third of all health care workers have Long Covid symptoms, and 1 per cent of all our children.

More than half of those reporting Long Covid symptoms say they’ve been suffering for two years or more.

As there’s still no diagnostic test, we can only say people report themselves as LC sufferers.

Accordingly, people can’t seem to resist “helpful” advice: Think positive! Just get on with it! Have you tried this essential oil?

No chronic illness sufferer has, as far as I know, ever recovered due to being told it might be in their head; it’s an attitude that has made Sam himself sicker, as he’s tried to “push through” his symptoms — which only increased them.

While we don’t know yet how the Munich study will be received, change seems likely to be slower than sufferers would like, and than we all need.

The current situation leaves people who are already exhausted and overwhelmed by illness facing further battles: with ignorance, with self-blame, and with the system, as they struggle for a diagnosis.

Sam is not alone in saying he feels abandoned by a society in “deep denial” about his condition. This sense of isolation is all the greater for being one of very few Long Covid activists of colour; he also suspects this makes it even harder for him to get his voice heard.

The media seems generally uninterested; this should be a national story, but appears to be regarded as yesterday’s news. LC is just not, it seems, in any sense “sexy.”

Two of the UK’s best-known writers share Sam’s struggle.

It’s well-known that Michael Rosen became seriously ill with Covid after contracting it in March 2020.

The bestselling author, poet and presenter was in a coma for 40 days, in intensive care for 48, and in hospital for a total of three months.

Rosen still has blurred vision he suffers in his left eye, and hearing loss in his left ear, which unbalances him.

“I’ve also got numb toes. It’s as if you have these strange cushions underneath your feet,” Rosen said in a recent interview.

“It’s possible that these creaks and pains which I call ‘pinball pains’ around my body have increased a lot since Covid. But if I do a lot of stretching, that does help.”

Rosen had also some counselling to talk through the hallucinations and delirium he experienced in hospital, although he says his dreams were “more hippy-like than nightmarish” — he can recall bizarre visions of, inexplicably, German Christmas parties. His sleep remains disturbed:

“There are some nasty moments when I wake up in the night. I call it ‘Lonely Corridor Syndrome’. As I’m lying there, I’m instantly back in the hospital lying there. It’s a very mild form of post-traumatic stress disorder.

“There’s not much you can do about it immediately. I have to go into various forms of mental and physical tricks to play on myself to put it away again. It’s a sense of loneliness.”

Rosen described his ordeal and recovery in Many Different Kinds Of Love, combining prose and verse with enduring tribute to the NHS. It’s a good sign that his latest book is called Getting Better; but it’s still an ongoing process, and Rosen acknowledges the importance of family support, not available to all: “I dread to think what it would have been like if I’d just come home to an empty house.”

Another acclaimed author and LC sufferer is AL Kennedy.

I spoke to Kennedy about how she feels now, as she recovers from another Covid bout. A very fit woman with a punishing schedule, Kennedy has found her literary skills affected as well as her body: “With the LC my heart beat is still 10/15 bpm faster when I’m just generally unfit — much faster than my fit rate.

“I can work, but I’m slower.”

I can’t see a drop in quality in new work she’s kindly sent me compared to her old: but Kennedy of course knows her style better than anyone, and she can. It’s frustrating: “[My work] still needs more rewrites than it did. I need a lot more rest. The thyroid rumbles along in the background. If I lecture, I have to set out notes for safety and follow them.”

She was used to being able to speak spontaneously and just follow the track her mind took.

“I’m way better than I was,” Kennedy reflects: “In 2021 I would be knocked out for weeks at a time. Semi-permanent migraine, couldn’t finish sentences, couldn’t remember tasks to complete them, probably not a safe driver...”

Life is still not the same: “A lot has improved, but I live in fear of re-infection; and group work is hard to run in a mask. When I’m working at a uni, or travelling, I am basically in a mask for seven or eight hours straight... I compromise on stage without a mask and then signing [books] with one... It’s miserable,” she concludes.

The future is unpredictable, both in how Britain will react to the news out of Munich and how the condition will develop: researchers have found evidence of the protein spike four years after infection not because it goes away after that, but because four years is all the distance we currently have from those first infections.

As Sam says, “Many people recover. Many people get worse. A few weeks ago, I met Alan, who got Long Covid in March 2020. This March he had a mini-stroke, and lost the sight in one eye overnight.”

Sam tends to operate on pure adrenalin, which is unsustainable long-term, and means his Long Covid activism takes a toll on him: as much as he wants to raise awareness, and as vital as that is, every article he writes, every radio appearance, drains his limited resources of energy. A Catch-22 situation.

Sam is not impressed by the new government’s response so far.

Although figures reveal LC leading to higher healthcare demands and costs, meaning it is both an economic and ethical imperative to tackle it, the Department for Health and Social Care seems coy about its plans.

Parliamentary Under-Secretary Andrew Gwynne admitted, in response to a parliamentary question form the Greens, that he chaired a “roundtable” of researchers and “people with lived experience” in October this year.

The LC community has been unenthusiastic about what it calls this “secret meeting” to which they say they were not invited: and they want concrete information about Gwynne’s next steps.

Sam considers himself to have disabilities as a result of LC, as many do; he is also extremely concerned by the late November passing of the Assisted Dying Bill.

“I am absolutely horrified by it,” he tells me.

“In Canada, they started off with assisted dying only applying to the terminally ill.

“Then they expanded to include chronically ill and disabled people.

“I, and many other disabled people, are terrified it will happen here in the same way. And there’s no coincidence that the Assisted Dying Bill comes at the same time as the white paper on Getting Britain Working.”

The government must act fast to take on board the Munich findings, and involve activists like Sam and the wider the LC community in an open and transparent process for future funding, support, treatment and mitigation.

This is a frightening and unpredictable condition which could affect any one of us at any time: and an increased cohort of people with disabilities at a time when our National Health Service has been pushed to its knees is alarming.

Labour must act fast, must involve activists like Sam Williams, and must make Long Covid a priority, if we’re not going to deepen what is already a crisis.

[trans-axolotl]

hi, I really like your blog and your antipsych thoughts have been very helpful to me. i hope this is ok to ask for advice (sorry i have brain fog and this question is vague)? i think i'm looking for 'unconventional' advice or suggestions, the kind that someone in the psych system would not necessarily recommend to me.

i have had a bad history with therapy, but i very much need some kind of mental support that i am not getting otherwise in my life (issues like CPTSD, DID, among other things). im in a position where i /can/ go to therapy, and i've been with a therapist that specializes in the things that are causing me the most problems for a year and theyre fine (i.e. has not ever helped me figure out anything about how to improve my life but has been someone who can perscribe me stuff, and hasn't done anything actively harmful to me like other therapists and psychiatrists have), but going is so upsetting for some reason (maybe because the therapy environment has been so bad in the past?) and not at all helpful. it's useful for me to have a relationship to a psychiatrist/therapist for medication and other 'navigating the system' reasons, but it's absolutely unhelpful. i am very frustrated and disillusioned with the whole concept of 'therapy' in general (maybe due to my history)!! but i don't know how else to get help!

it's harder because of the brain fog. i also feel very isolated partially because i'm in a not great environment, and partially because i have multiple mental illnesses in addition to not being a very nice person. i have felt really let down by supposed friends i've come to for help who just said therapy speak stuff like 'you should get help....' and 'sorry i don't have the emotional bandwidth to help <3' and stuff like that. it really makes me feel like i'm too messed up to be able to ask for help from regular people and i have to go to the psych industry but of course i've already been failed by them too :(

hey anon!

I think what you've said makes so much sense. I feel like we're so often told "go get help" but when we do try to seek support, it isn't as simple as just going and easily finding a therapist who is able to provide all the support and care we need. It can be so hard to find and pay for therapy in the first place, harder still to find someone who specializes in a therapy style to meet our needs, and sometimes we might not just be in a place in our life where we are in an environment that allows us to do in depth therapy work. And I just want to say that it isn't your fault if therapy isn't meeting your needs right now--that doesn't mean that you're failing at therapy. You absolutely aren't alone in feeling dissatisfied with therapy and wanting other options.

For me, what's helped when I've been considering making changes about how I approach my mental health has first been sitting down and really taking a thorough look at what things are working and what things aren't working. It seems like you've done a lot of that already--you know that it's helpful to have a therapeutic relationship to get meds and for help in the system, you know that the therapy environment hasn't been particuarly helpful for other types of healing work, and it seems like another thing you're thinking about is how to get mental support from your friends and other people in your everyday life. I think those are really good starting places to consider where you want to go from here. It might be helpful to make a list of what feels like priorities to focus on right now--do you want to develop more skills for navigating crisis? Do you want to focus on changing your relationship with dissociation? harm reduction for self destructive behaviors? building resilience and cultivating relationships in your life? There's no right or wrong answers here--you're going to be the expert on what feels most important right now.

I also just want to say that I think it's really shitty when we're made to feel like we're too crazy or too needy or too messed up to be able to be cared for and supported in our community. I've definitely had people tell me that, and it really hurts and makes me feel hopeless, like I'm always going to be struggling and that there's no chance that I'll be able to get better. But fuck that. We deserve to have meaningful connections in our community, access to resources that help us, and to be able to build resilient relationships where getting emotional support isn't considered an unmanageable burden, even if we're mad/mentally ill/ neurodivergent. I'm sorry that you haven't been able to rely on your friends and community that way, although I know it's hard when everyone we know is struggling and people don't have the energy or skills or knowledge to be able to help each other.

This is getting long, so I'm just going to list off a ton of random tips and suggestions, and I hope some of them might resonate with you.

Join a peer support group aligned with antipsych values. Hearing Voices Network, Alternatives to Suicide with the Wildflower alliance, Multiplied by One, FEDUP trans/intersex eating disorder support groups are all great options.

harm reduction! this can be especially applicable for self-destructive behaviors, but just in general moving outside of an "abstinence-only model." working to understand your actions on a spectrum of totally chaotic, unmanaged behaviors to more managed, intentional relationships with those behaviors. embracing any positive change as an important step instead of self-blame and all-or-nothing thinking.

Trying to think of the best way to describe what I'm thinking here, so I might not have the best phrasing. But basically, spending time separating your ideas for what wellbeing and quality of life look like for you from the psychiatric system's ideas of what a "normal," "healthly," quality of life looks like. For me, this looked like realizing that I wasn't actually interested in getting rid of all my hallucinations, but instead I just wanted to lessen the distress I experienced and find a way to hallucinate without panicking. So I guess just in general--really exploring what is actually important to you for your wellbeing and not limiting yourself to mainstream definitions of "recovery."

Unconventional coping skills, or coping skills that traditional psychiatry deems "risky." I've talked with some people who things like getting tattoos and piercings are actually incredibly healing for them, and are an important part of their "therapeutic" journey. Not going to go into detail or promote other "risky" coping skills on Tumblr lmao, but more just say that it's okay if there's things that therapists view as risky that you might have another perspective on how it fits into your personal healing.

Building up your and your loved ones capacity for community care. This can be a really hard one, because I know it always frustrated me when I would see people talking online about how great things like care webs or the power of peer support when I just didn't have any of that in my physical everyday life. So I'm not just going to put this here like it's a magical solution or something that's easy to accomplish. It's something that can take a ton of work and we're allowed to be frustrated about that. I think one strategy that helped me with this was spending a lot of time building my own understanding of my own capacity to help, my own needs, and what ways I would like to be cared for. That helped me start small, just by having conversations with my loved ones when I wasn't in crisis and saying "Hey, this is how I would like things to go when I'm in crisis. This is something that helps me when I'm hallucinating. This is a way you could let me know that you can't support me tonight but still leaves room for us to have connection. This is how I can help you. Let's talk openly together and develop and practice how we want to care for each other." Starting with just one person and one conversation really went a long way for me in terms of eventually building up an actual support network and for me was super instrumental in healing work.

Setting out an hour a week that's my "self therapizing time." just using one hour a week to look up new resources, try out new skills, journal, do self-inquiry, participate in activism, do something that brings me joy, read something new about mental health, literally anything that feels intentional in that hour. trying out a lot of new things and quitting a lot of new things!

Incorporating your physical needs. I'm sure we've heard a million times things like "get sleep, nourish yourself, go outside," and all that is great but often feels fucking impossible when we're mentally doing not great. but I guess just saying it can be good to be aware of how our physical body impacts our mental health in other ways. things like trying to get our sensory needs met, embracing movement that feels good + making space for rest, embracing things that bring our physical body pleasure whether that's tasty food, sex or other kinds of physical intimacy with other people, if it's using substances in a way that feels helpful or joyful or fun--anything really!

Here's a bunch of random orgs and resources that I have found helpful: Fireweed Collective, Wildflower Alliance, Project LETS, Mapping our Madness, Mad Survival Tools, Organizing Guide for Psychiatric Survivors, MindFreedom Resources, Multiplied by one (I can't personally vouch because I haven't been to their groups, but I have a friend with DID who attends these groups and had positive things to say about them.)

I'd also add on this book: "Psychosis, Dissociation, and Trauma: Evolving perspectives on Severe Psychopathology" although I do want to give a warning that this book is a heavy academic text that has a lot of clinical and stigmatizing language. For me, it had some helpful information that helped me make connections between my experiences of trauma, dissociation, and psychosis, but I would not recommend reading it unless you feel like you're in the right headspace and can deal with wading through a lot of the psychiatric narrative.

These are all just some things that sometimes work for me, so please feel free to disregard anything that doesn't resonate with you. I'd also love it if followers could add on with any tips, resources, any "unconventional" advice!

thanks for reaching out, anon, and I hope you have a good night 💜

[softsky-daily]

7/17/2024

It was an inside kinda day.

Positive thing: I got a lot of sleep.

I ended up not getting much done just because I was exhausted, and also stressed thinking about internship tomorrow. Going to bed and waking up early and being there all day is just the worst. I'm hoping it won't be so bad this week since our supervisor said she'd take us on field trips to different internship sites, but she might still be sick, and either way she's canceled on stuff before.

I really need to get ahold of her so I can tell her I'm quitting early. Going there the past few months has just been draining away my willpower like a huge motivation vacuum.

Man. I thought I'd be over working at places that make me feel shitty ever since I quit my last job, but it had to be baked right into my program (which, for the record, has also been making me feel shitty). I was talking to a classmate friend a bit and she said she could see her future so clearly once she graduated, becoming a private practice counselor straight out the gate. I think that made me realize I am just in a whole other universe compared to that. My mind is focused on being anywhere else, doing anything else. It almost breaks my heart because this is what I wanted to do since I was little, and certainly I think I'd be a very good counselor.

But not here. And not like this. I need a serious break regardless, and it is just not being given to me. I can take a lot but I'm at my limit and it's terrible that the overarching message in this field I keep hearing is that we don't rest. Whatever self care we tout, we don't actually follow through with that. We have to push through because our clients need us and nobody else can do it.

And I think it is true to some extent. Our system just doesn't allow for better, accessible mental health services, and it falls to those willing to sacrifice a lot to be able to help. Another classmate friend told me he's seen so many counselors who have just lost their humanity over the years trying to stay and help at these places. I know what he means. Especially at internship - the softness and gentleness is just not in them anymore, even the ones who stay generally kind. I can understand why. It's a tough job. Even I can feel some of my gentleness leaving and I hate that more than anything.

I remember feeling frustrated because people have said "this career just might not be for you." And if it isn't? What would you have me do? I still need to finish my degree. The feeling of being trapped is so palpable I could almost reach out and shake the bars of my cage for real.

Anyway, tomorrow I'll just get myself through internship, and then the next day the same thing, and then I can sleep in on the weekend. On Sunday I'm volunteering at a dinner for Japanese students visiting from Takasaki High School (which I believe is in Gunma Prefecture). I'm excited for that. And hopefully somewhere in between I'll be able to flag down my internship supervisor and tell her I'm quitting early.

[cowboyjen68]

Hi Jen!! I’ve recently realized that I have an extreme fear of intimacy and am very emotionally unstable. This realization is making a lot of things about me and my life make sense, but I’m not really sure about how to move forward and get better? I want to be able to have relationships in the future but It’s something I truly can’t imagine is possible for me if I don’t try to get better. Do you have any advice for this?

p.s. I just want to say that I really appreciate you doing what you do. I can’t imagine how taxing it can be to constantly console people all the time, thank you for being someone we can turn to.

I am going to respond to the last part first. (the PS)  Thanks for letting me know my blog helps in some way to create a place where you feel like you can reach out. Don’t worry about me. I am pretty good at balancing life with online life and taking breaks when I need to rest my heart and brain. I have lots of support to talk through things and hash out my ideas and feelings. My crunchy granola hippy (said with affection) calls me an Extraverted  Empath and told me my Dad was the same way. Basically, I don’t get exhausted from consoling or supporting those in distress like others, instead I thrive on it. 

A first step in getting your mental health in balance is to recognize you might have some struggles. The second step it so get an official diagnosis or evaluation. Do not rely on google or the internet or even friends/family to tell you what the issues are that you are dealing with. Seek some professional help. IF you have insurance or live in a state where therapy is affordable please seek out a good fit. Do not be afraid to “interview” possible candidates and ask for what you want. IF you want a female who is between 40 and 60, you have the right to ask for that. If you prefer a different demographic advocate for who it is you think will best suit your needs.

If you begin therapy and it is not a good fit, any decent doctor will be happy to give you a referral to someone else. Good therapists recognize they might not be everyone’s cup of tea. Once you get a therapist she can help you get an evaluation through referrals to a larger hospital or mental health facility. It is highly possible there is no “firm” or specific diagnosis. But narrowing down your struggles can be very helpful to you and to your counselor. 

If you cannot afford therapy, inquire at a local University or non profit medical center (hospital) to see if they offer free help for those who can’t pay. Contact your state's social services and ask for help. Social workers know their way around the medical system. Most hospitals have social workers who can help with paperwork etc. It is their job.

There are, of course, some self help videos, youtube channels, books and other resources that you can research. My rule of thumb is the more simple the better and anything you can do to help gain tools to tackle one symptom at a time is good. For instance, if you are really struggling with holding a job, look into that one specific thing. If you have social anxiety and feel like it is holding you back from friendships, work on that. You might not be able to do enough self help to treat the WHOLE you but you can do little things to ease the symptoms of the greater illness. 

Check into Holistic Chiropractic care. I know, I know. Crunch Granola. But getting adjusted, having your physical body feel better can be a real thing. It can truly help you get into a better mental state when your body is better. Often, and this is a proven fact, our bodies react to our mental distress so then we end up struggling with mental AND physical discomfort.  However, Chiropractors are not for everyone. Mine has helped me greatly for almost 20 years. You can get a massage, do yoga, work on your posture or get a decent pair of shoes and go for some walks. Anything you can do to help your body recover from any mental trauma or pain is helpful in your overall attempt to feel better. 

Keep in mind. You do not have to be “fixed” or in some perfect mental state of calm and collected to be deserving of a relationship.  You must be aware of how your mental health affects others and how your actions/reactions can manifest. You can learn tools to form more appropriate responses to stress or triggers. Most mental illnesses are not really going to be “cured” but instead we must understand that others should not necessarily have to learn to work around our issues but we can learn skills so we can live in the world with greater comfort and ease. 

I hope this helps a bit. I would include links but everything is so regionally/state/country based when it comes to mental illness. If you search articles to get information check scientifically published journals over “opinion” pieces and check sources for opinion pieces for validity. If looking into government services make sure the website is .gov otherwise there are a ton of bad sites who offer to help for a “fee” but you get the same help for free at government sites.   You don’t need a middleman to obtain social or university or non profit help. 

[archive-of-the-incident]

PLEASE CHECK AFTER THIS POST FOR THE POLL WE PUT UP TO SEE WHO’D BE INTERESTED IN WHAT :) We did one and a couple were interested in cheap adopts but that was months ago. Check out the sample arts attached, too which will be posted after this! All of these higher prices might change, too. I also don’t wanna hear any bullshit off “profiting off this situation”. And I didn’t even do anything. But you mfs have proved you’re absolutely insane and will make up anything. I had plans a long fucking time ago, I’m not “profiting” off of anything, you bitches interrupted me and my headmates. Check my tumblr from the beginning.

❌:Me and my headmates will be back to our usual activity, including the plans of cheap, or pretty affordable commissions AND adopts that were mentioned a while back. We just need to finish an art trade and a birthday card and we’ll hop to it.. I am so sorry to Ramona who got her beautiful adopts overshadowed by this bullshit.

Some of our upcoming plans and info

(Note: Customs will always cost more.)

The cheap adopts info-

(Will range from 3 USD to 25-30, it depends. We’re basically going to make a whole price range, less complex adopts on base or not in chibi forms for 3-5 USD at least and the highest I’d ever think we’d go is 30-40 for special events. You have an option to pay for those for much less OR wait for a sale where you could get more content for that price, it’s all gonna depend how we feel. 30-40 would be for complicated hand drawn refs and an added headshot etc. Or, one for 20-25 on base with added on art.

It’s all gonna depend on how well our sales are received. So don’t take any of those higher prices as solidified. All we know for sure right now is that there’ll typically be a lot of 3-5 USD ones along with 10-12 USD. They usually will be that cheap. Our goal is to provide lower prices and discounts out of our own kindness, and because we are in a place where we are financially comfortable and well taken care of, and we just want to give back for that privilege out of our own want, while still making a couple dollars on the side for our system so they can buy things for themselves. And also to get Fawn things as gifts for her hard work in school, and fuel her special interests of course. She has had jobs in physical establishments but they have taken such a toll on her physical health (asthma attacks and more) AND mental health, and she deserves to rest and be able to do art at home or have her alters do it. We’ll actually be living some time in Colombia each year where she’ll be hella pampered like she deserves. So yes, we just want to do a nice thing and also making these specific adopts accessible (you’ll see some of the ideas in a minute :) ) because of how much fandoms or any kinds of special interests/hyperfixations can mean to people, and we wanna give a discount on that.

-Most of our adopt ideas is making feral/furry adopts of who we’re based on and other characters from DFTM OR references (such as mark’s adopts hes planning based off of the movies hes canonically reviewed,) (if anyone is interested,) and again if anyone is interested there will be other fandoms, for those who are also fictives, fictkin of them, or have them as comfort characters.

But that won’t be all we make. We’ll make a variety of things.

Note: Some freebies will be released occasionally. None of our adopts have a schedule.

(VERY GENERAL LIST)

-Warrior cat/other fandom/non fandom oc adopts (Will range from 3 USD to 25-30 USD, it depends. We’re basically going to make a whole price range, less complex adopts on base or not in chibi forms for 3-5 USD at least,

Elaborations: Character based of of “fursonas/feralsonas” being higher priced and with more art, along with characters who are separate of them. but still themed around them at around 25-30 USD maybe? Depends. It would involve chibis, back and front view etc the whole thing.

General common hyperfixation/special interest adopts for very cheap, like for example bug themed adopts, dinosaur themed adopts, etc etc. (You are actually free to request them down below of what you’d like to be done, and it can be reserved for you! This would be cheaper than what we price regular customs at IF you choose artistic liberty or a premade.)

Choose your hyperfixation/special interest, species etc, fully customizable: 20 USD (Off base ref)

Choose your hyperfixation/special interest mystery adopt: 10 USD (Off base ref)

MLP oc adopts- 5-10 USD (Off base)

Farm animal themed adopts - 4-15 USD, maybe 20

HMF furry/feral experiment based adopts- probably 20-25 due to complexity.

Series of adopts that are themed around certain events or references-

Adopts centered around Mark’s movie reviews, like bat furry adopts or knight themed adopts etc. (Mentioned earlier)

Movie themed adopts in general

But they’ll be just as original to where it’s just a fun nod.

And more! Keep in mind we sell and create a variety of things. It won’t just be adopts or just DFTM etc, if you read me trying navigate our next plans to the end, thank you! Polls will be coming in with art example. Check this thread where we try to keep all the info together.

[multiplicity-positivity]

i don't know if you guys are going to be able to help us but I don't know who to turn to,

Just for context, I am part of a newly discovered system, we have known that there are multiple people around it's been a couple of years but it was just recently that it was suggested that this might be caused by a disorder, but this is something that only a couple of other alters know about; our host knows about us and has interacted with us before but he is in deep denial over it.

Anyway, recently I have been trying to organize things and manage our inner world but we are having quite a few problems with communication and acceptance over this condition and it's starting to leak into the host's everyday life; (like for example we aways suffered from headaches due to switching but it's been getting more frequent and it makes our host (or anyone for that matter) to be completely unable to function properly, which leads to other health related problems); I know I should seek a therapist or a doctor to talk about this but medical care at the moment is pretty much impossible because of monetary and trauma related reasons so I am not sure how I should go about this; I just want to take care of my system and our host but it is just getting a little too much and I am lost I don't know what to do.

I am here looking for some advice from people that understand system related issues like this but it's completely okay if you guys can't help us, and my apologies in case you already answered any other ask like this.

Thank you.

Hi! So we know you said you couldn’t seek therapy or medical help, but we’d like to pass along something that often gets repeated for us in therapy.

We’ve been doing trauma work over the past 8 months or so. It is grueling, exhausting, and depressing work. We regularly get overwhelmed and reach a point where we’re not able to function. When it gets to this point, we don’t talk about trauma in therapy until we’re feeling better. It’s all about prioritizing our health and well-being, and that can’t happen if we’re always pushing ourselves in therapy and in our everyday lives without taking breaks to check in and relax.

Even if y’all aren’t doing trauma work, something very similar may be happening. You might be trying to take on too much at once, causing your system to suffer as a result. If learning about and trying to manage your system is making it difficult for you to function, you very well may need to pump the brakes for a while. Spend some time not focusing on your system. Learn a new hobby, watch a show or play a video game, and let your system’s inner workings sit unconsidered for some time. After your system has had a chance to calm down, and you’re not stressing out over your plurality as much, it may be safe to continue your efforts. But pushing yourself and your system too hard too fast can absolutely cause your system to get burnt out and have more difficulties recovering than normal.

So definitely our best advice for y’all would be to take things slow! Don’t push yourself too hard, and if it’s getting difficult to function, pause your efforts of in-system work until your system is feeling better. Do something you enjoy for a while and try to relax. Your system isn’t going anywhere - it’s okay to take your time figuring this out. And going slowly/taking your time with this will have huge benefits for your whole system. There’s no rush to get everything sorted and figured out ASAP. In fact, rushing like this can be detrimental (and it sounds like it’s had some negative effects on your system!).

For your host in denial, we have a post specifically for dealing with denial - maybe it could help put his mind at ease and take the pressure off the rest of you a little bit:

We’re wishing you the best of luck with this! We really aren’t a good stand in for therapy or medical treatment, though we understand you may be nervous to seek treatment if you’ve been traumatized in the past, or entirely unable to afford it. We hope that soon you can get the help you need for your system - there are gentle, trauma-informed therapists out there who could handle your system’s situation with kindness and grace! Until you’re able to access something like that, though, we’re wishing you peace, comfort, and plenty of rest! Good luck with everything, and remember to stay hydrated and take plenty of breaks!

🌸 Margo and 💫 Parker

[bad-advice-its-very-bad]

tw general mentions of mental health

so i have this friend. let's call them emily. i've known emily for two years now, and they've grown to be one of my closest friends. mostly because we both really struggle with mental health stuff and at that point in my life no one else knew about those struggles. we helped each other through a lot of really crappy stuff and times. the difference is, in those two years, i've gone to, and am still in therapy, and have learned coping skills, have a support system etc etc etc ive tried convincing emily (on numerous occasions) to do the same, but they consistently refuse to do so, and they still pretty much only have me. there's also a ton of other stuff, but i could write a ten page essay about that. pretty much, our friendship, even though it's great feels kind of one-sided where im reaching out and they take weeks or months to respond (if they do at all) and dont really talk to me when we see each other in person and it's just getting really draining emotionally. so a few days ago, i finally make the decision to, well, not cut them off but pretty much tell them i'd had enough and im going to take a break for a while. they responded and pretty much just went straight to the self-deprecation (pretty much im sorry im so worthless and can't even maintain a friendship). and while im just so relieved that i've cut them off, more or less, to some degree, im just so worried since im all they have and if im gone who knows what will happen. so what should i do?

sorry for the long message

hum, that’s a tricky one.

First things first, I’d shove a WHOLE lotta resources on mental health in their messages. I know it may seem like your annoying them, but if it’s that bad they deserve to know there’s helplines and chats and groups that they can turn to. (I suggest vet them before you send them)

Secondly, sometimes it’s hard for people to realize they are allowed to reach out for help. Even if they only think it’s minor or it will take valuable space for others that “ are worst than them” But they have every right to reach out for help, their allowed to go to people with minor issues or major issues. And if you can somehow get that through their head you’ll probably see some improvement.

thirdly, I don’t think they can access traditional in person therapy as it seems. You can never know why, personally for me it’s a whole BIG awful talk about my mental health that I never want to tell my family. And it might be a similar situation with your friend, so unorthodox ways to get that same therapy experience might benefit them alot.

fourthly, you can’t help everyone. Sometimes it’s on them to figure out how to cope and understand how to get better, and even though you love them and care deeply it’s hard to get them to understand that. If you’re worried your friend might be engaging in risky behaviors (S/H, alcoholism, drugs, suicidal behavior, taking too many risks for no apparent reason.)

I suggest trying to talk to them about harm reduction.

fifthly, you being emotionally drained and exhausted by being their therapist friend is totally valid. your friend saying self deprecating things is just a symptom of a bigger problem they have, it's not your fault or anything you need a break from them. if they were in the same situation they would do the same thing, it's hard to manage both your mental health and your friends. I don't blame you for being exhausted, the reason I do this stuff is because I'm exhausted by my own problems and this is a healthy and constructive way to help both you and me. your helping your friend out of love, but also obligation.

I think a good plan to do is.

give your friend a pep talk and show them tons of alternate ways to access therapy that is not in person.

give them helpline information and tell the "I've known you for so long, I'd never try to hurt you. I just want you to know there's options if life gets hard and I'm not around

tell them about harm reduction, and CURB any and all negative connotations about addiction and self harm. if they are suffering the best thing you can do is be accepting and show them ways to safely and also reduce the harm of the addictions/self harm.

tell them if they are being abused. in anyway period, they can trust you to not victim blame or something without knowing the full story. we don't know what's happening with them, but we have to be kind and caring if that's the reason for her mental health. tell them "it was never your fault, you didn't know." or "you were just a kid, it was never you that was the problem but how you were treated. it's okay to be upset or angry, or grieve the life you should have had. that's normal. trust me I'm here for you."

also if the whole abuse thing is a yes, give them tons of abuse helplines. you and I don't know how to go forward with that knowledge but the helplines know how to.

support them and tell them truely why you feel drained (if you Hadn't already.) and tell them you actually care alot about them and this is not an attack or that your mad at them or anything. your overwhelmed too, and you both should feel not overwhelmed. (VERY IMPORTANT, YOU HAVE TO SAY YOUR NOT ANGRY OR ANYTHING. mentally ill people tend to think the worst if you don't say it. be kind and caring, and they should not feel so bad.)

if that doesn't work, I think you yourself should call a helpline and ask about strategies to help your friend. they should know a lot more than both you and me.

thank you for sending an ask in, this has been interesting!

I hope you can figure out a way to help your friend.

if worst comes to worse, I suggest you give your friend character.ai's psychologist's link to your friend. it's better than nothing, and it's surprisingly helped me too. so it might help your friend open up.

here's the link LINK

I hope I was able to provide a push in the right direction, remember this is the BAD advice blog. not everything will work, sometimes we both have to fail a bit to figure out the best way to help people.

[daz4i]

Hey, i just read a vent you posted a while ago, please dont read the rest if it might affect you negatively.

I just wanna say, i have a friend who has depression. She talks to me alot, and the stuff we talk about revolve around the same topic like you've mentioned. I never, ever found her boring, nor have i ever wanted to stop talking to her enrirely. I dont think id ever get tired of our conversations. Sure, everyone has their own mental health to take care of, and i know when to ask her for a bit of time for myself, since i know i wont be of much help to anyone if im not stable myself. And im confident that it works for us both. She has a support system that's got her back when i can't be there for her, and when i can, I'll lend an ear. always.

What im saying is, there's nothing wrong with talking to your friends or anyone close to you about what you're dealing with or going through. They love you, and they want to be there for you, just like how i want to be there for my friend. And ill never ever want her to feel like she couldnt talk to me about anything she's going through, even if its the same thing, even if its over and over again for 5 years, and for however long in the future. Just like how your friends and close ones would want you to talk to them.

we're human, and we all need our support. So please, if you can, never feel guilty about sharing or talking about anything you're going through with the people you love and who love you. Some people would make you feel otherwise, but you have to be strong and know that there's nothing wrong with something so guiltless about sharing your weight, no matter what kind of weight it may be.

Im sorry if this was too much to read and i know this wont make things okay. i just wanted to let you know this. stay safe and take care, okay?

ah i appreciate the input, thank you!!

i agree with what you're saying but at the same time i think my issue comes from like. not feeling I'm allowed to complain when I'm not taking any steps to change things

ik my friends love me but also i feel like i make at least some of them mad when i talk abt my problems bc it's like "if you're suffering so much why aren't you doing anything about it"

so. ig this is another layer to the whole thing. the guilt stems more from complaining abt smth i might possibly one day be able to change (tho i highly doubt it, given my life experience so far, which is why i stopped trying) than just venting abt my feelings. i think. but then turning it into something beautiful can ease the guilt at least bc it gives it some other excuse to exist, if that makes sense

[starshipcaptainjojo]

I promise I didn’t wake up today to make an already depressing post worse, so I promise to end with something at least a little uplifting.

But first... the bad news.

FACT CHECK: Not Forbes, but Yahoo Finance. And we all know how good Yahoo is at financial decisions! Also this is the MEDIAN not mean. So. There’s that. Sorry.

Excerpt: “...members of [Gen Z] have a median of $33,000 across all of their retirement savings accounts. That’s compared to $162,000 for Baby Boomers, $87,000 for Gen Xers, and $50,000 for Millennials. The estimated median savings among all workers is $67,000.While Gen Zers do have a lower balance in their retirement accounts, they’re actually saving a larger percentage of their annual salary compared to older generations.“

Link to article is HERE

This whole article is about how that $33k is a BUMMER. Because Millennials “had $50k at their age” (spoiler alert: no we didn’t.) The thing you should take away from this article is that savings are going down generation over generation. And these geniuses’ ‘solutions’ are to put more money aside for retirement when they admit openly (in the above excerpt) that Gen Z are putting a higher percentage of their wages toward retirement than older generations already!

Almost! Like! They’re not being paid enough!!!

But I am but a humble Millennial with a theoretical $50k to retire on.

Which brings us to the sad rest of this conversation:

33k is NOT MUCH. Theoretically, to retire comfortably at age 65 (in America) you need 25 years of your current salary saved up at the time of retirement- and that’s assuming you have the life expectancy of your PARENTS! Which you DON’T because advancements in our understanding of our health lead experts to believe that the first person to live to be 150 years old has already been born!

$33k is at the BARE MINIMUM one year of income (and don’t get me started on inflation) AND on top of that doesn’t account for health related expenses, which will be a thing whether you’re healthy or not. Long term care options in America SUCK THE BIG POOPER. Our services are bad! If you weren’t working full-time, you weren’t paying into social security which is meant to supplement income! AND FURTHERMORE! They (the GOP, and my parents) say that the government might have messed up enough that by the time us Millennials reach retirement age, Social Security won’t exist.

So what can you ACTUALLY do?

Why yes, this isn’t all doom and gloom, thank you.

The answer (in America) is VOTE for people who support the people! Infrastructure includes help for the elderly- which you will be some day! And for everyone (even non-Americans whose lives I know nothing about)  learn about financial literacy!

Sorry to break it to you but unless you get lucky or are super frugal (both of which are valid but not assuredly long-term believe it or not) you might not have the resources right now to invest in your future. So you need to learn about your options!

From complicated (and annoyingly uncertain) things like stock options, what an index is, and how to write things off on your taxes, to more day-to-day things like how to manage your budgets, how to determine if something is good value or not and how to prioritize your needs. Your job, Zoomies, or whatever they’re calling you, is to LEARN HOW TO BEAT THE SYSTEM.

There are things school won’t teach you. Websites with resources no one tells you about, or that you don’t think will help yet. But they WILL EVENTUALLY.  Because the only other thing you can do right now is BET ON YOURSELF!

Remember that you might be the only one who can set you up for your future! You owe it to you to have a little faith that you can do it. Learn because even if current-you doesn’t have the money to think about retirement, adult-you will! Some version of you someday is going to get some money. From a job, from a scratcher, from the sidewalk in the rain in a blood-stained leather briefcase. And when you get it you want to be smart about what you do with it. BET THAT YOU WILL HAVE MORE IN THE FUTURE.

Here are some resources I learned from:

Best Credit Cards in 2023 (Nerdwallet, lists cards by types of rewards you can get)

Millennial Money (Forbes, targeted to middle/upper class but they’re not wrong)

What’s an Index? (Investopedia, Intimidating but useful, best for searching terms)

What’s a Fiduciary? (Investopedia again, but please learn what this is. It’s very important when you actually get some money to make sure YOUR best interests are being considered.)

Microsaving Apps (like Acorns) (Inverstorjunkie, good for testing your abilities and instincts in the stock market. There’s also a Fidelity one that wasn’t bad, but I ended up not going for any of them myself.)

Check out How Women Invest if you go down this rabbit hole. They’re targeting older Millennials but they know a lot of good resources for anyone. I also talked to a financial advisor who told me hedge fund managers are full of shit and you should make your own stock elections if you know how to read the stock market. It’s trend spotting, and if you have the time and energy, doing it yourself could get you serious money.

This got very long! Don’t be intimidated! You can do this! At this stage all you have to do is go to town on some knowledge. Keep in mind your sources and that everyone has an agenda, but that as long as you know that you can still learn from them!

So learn! Make money! Then hoard it until you can retire! You must believe- I must believe that our generation and yours will retire.

Because I don’t want to do this forever.

And I’m betting on myself that we won’t.

[wisdomteethsydney]

The Deadly Consequences of Ignoring Wisdom Teeth Problems

Wisdom teeth might seem harmless, but ignoring issues with them can be a ticking time bomb. Impacted wisdom teeth, which grow in awkward angles or get stuck under the gums, can create the perfect storm for infections. Imagine your wisdom teeth as unruly houseguests—if they don't settle in nicely, they cause chaos. When impacted wisdom teeth aren't treated, they can lead to infections that spread beyond just your mouth. It's not just about a toothache; these infections can get out of hand and enter your bloodstream, leading to a severe condition called sepsis.

What is Sepsis?

Sepsis is like your body going into full panic mode. When an untreated infection spreads, your immune system goes into overdrive, causing inflammation throughout your body. If you think that sounds scary—you're right! It can be life-threatening. That's why dental professionals stress the importance of affordable wisdom teeth removal Sydney services, to prevent these issues before they escalate. The earlier you tackle impacted wisdom teeth, the lower the risk of serious, even fatal complications.

Signs That Shouldn't Be Ignored

How do you know when your wisdom teeth are heading for trouble? If you notice swelling, pain, or pus around your gums, or you're feeling feverish, these might be signs that an infection is brewing. Don't brush it off. Infections from impacted wisdom teeth can escalate quickly, and once they enter your bloodstream, things get dangerous fast. Investing in wisdom teeth removal cost Sydney could literally save your life—there's no hyperbole here, untreated infections can lead to death if sepsis sets in.

How to Avoid Sepsis from Wisdom Teeth

Prevention is key when it comes to wisdom teeth issues. Regular dental check-ups are like your safety net—your dentist can spot any potential problems early and recommend cost of wisdom teeth removal Sydney services before things get serious. Removing problematic wisdom teeth before they cause infections helps you avoid the risk of sepsis altogether. It's like putting out a small fire before it spreads and becomes unmanageable. Trust your dentist when they suggest early removal; it's not just about avoiding discomfort, it's about protecting your overall health.

Wisdom Teeth Removal and Your Health

While sepsis is rare, it's a reminder of how interconnected our health really is. A seemingly small problem in your mouth can spiral into a critical health emergency if left unchecked. Wisdom teeth might feel like an afterthought, but ignoring them isn't worth the risk. Wisdom teeth removal doesn't just prevent crowding or pain—it prevents life-threatening complications. Remember, taking care of your mouth is taking care of your whole body.

If you've been putting off dealing with those wisdom teeth, it might be time to face them head-on. Regular dental visits, open communication with your dentist, and taking action when needed are all steps toward making sure those pesky molars don't cause bigger problems down the line. Sometimes, it's just about making the smart choice now to save yourself from trouble later.

The author is an experienced dentist in Sydney, with expertise in wisdom teeth removal and general oral health care. With a deep understanding of dental anatomy and years of practical expertise, they provide top-notch care, ensuring patients achieve long-term dental health. For affordable wisdom teeth removal and personalized dental services, visit: https://wisdomteethsydney.com.au/

[passingdaysthings]

12.20.2024 - Some Reflecting

Today is Friday.

I feel like I rarely write on Fridays, but I am procrastinating right now. I was cleaning my room, but I showered and had some taco bell. As the title says, I do plan on reflecting in this post and reviewing some big things that happened during this year.

Let's just tackle the biggest thing in my life because it's the most toxic thing I have ever chosen to do. My friendship with Taylor. I have been able to distance myself more, and I say that because I don't feel the anxious attachment that I felt before LOL. That kind of sounds like a shit thing to say because it makes things sound a bit disingenuous, but I really care about our friendship (like I've said multiple times). Our relationship is a huge part of my life and mental health, but I think that I have been able to draw a more clear like than before with my own emotions and attachment. I am only speaking for myself though because Taylor is still him. We did have a moment a few days ago with that suspicious cross the line part of our relationship, but I have decided to never be the one who initiates. I am trying my best to do what I can to handle our friendship. Let me just mention this too. Yes, based on the date, we did send each other Christmas, and we did plan to spend Christmas together? Not really planned, but we talked about opening gifts together on Christmas. Other than those things, our relationship still hasn't changed much on the surface, and the changes for mostly me and my personal issues.

Now to something a little more important. I finished my master's degree! Woooo! I say woo, but I don't really feel accomplished. First, I used chat gpt quite a bit to keep up with going to school full time and working full time. I was able to understand a lot of concepts because of my research background, but the actual coding was not for me. Learning how to code was just way too difficult of a task for me in such a short time. I feel no sense of accomplishment because of that, and I was basically blacked out looking back at myself. I can't wrap my mind around the fact that I learned stuff for a whole new career and working at the same time. I just don't think I did that I "learned". I just survived. Second, I looked at some job descriptions, and I feel like I am very lacking for many of the data science positions. I think the most common this is being proficient in SQL, but I only took one class on it. Tableu? Table? I don't know how to spell that, and I did not take a class on it. How is that on every job description, but I didn't even take a class. Wild. I try to ignore this fact because I have been told many times that the more you learn the more you feel like you don't know. Oh boy, oh boy. I agree. Every single class I took made me feel so inadequate. Third.. I don't know what I wanna do because this next job might be my job for the next 10+ years or I learn that I hate this new career path I took. I just feel very unprepared. NO WORRIES THOUGH. I have a decent plan. I am gonna tackle the biggest perpetrator to my anxiety, and that is, the learning experience. I am planning to teach myself stuff that I didn't feel comfortable with, and I will be able to really sit down and think about it since I am going to have 2 full weeks off of work. I also said don't feel comfortable with, but I plan on doing everything because I have questions for all of the things I learned. I want to believe that I will start my leaning journey on Monday. I wanna chill and clean my room this weekend since I will actually be home instead of running around.

Time to reflect on my work out and diet journey. Hm... around this time last year, I found out I had Hashimoto's disease, and it's just been undiagnosed for 27 years. Crazy. Hashimoto's disease is an autoimmune disorder in which the immune system attacks the thyroid gland, often leading to hypothyroidism (an underactive thyroid). This can result in symptoms like fatigue, weight gain, and difficulty processing food efficiently, including carbs, due to a slower metabolism. Thanks Chat GPT. This diagnoses made so much sense to me (Thanks Dr. Newbold and not the other lady before her) because I feel like I have always had issues with my weight even though I have been an athlete for most of my life. I will say that I did not eat a proper diet until relatively recently. I started 2024 with a simple task of limiting my carb intake and working out more consistently. I would say that I have been doing pretty well this year, and I lost it a bit towards the end here. It couldn't be helped though because I have been traveling a lot. My Hashimoto's is dormant from what I was told though. That's a good thing hehehe. I am going to up my diet and plans a little more this coming year since I have been doing well.

I want to limit my carbs more because I spent this year being very conscious of my carb intake, but this new year, I want to add a restriction. I am planning to add carbs for only one meal. I think this will also help with the intense bloating I feel.

Upping my fiber intake. This is big for me because I have hemorrhoids from stressing and school work, but I am done with school, so I need to really work on my stomach health. This is simple. I need to legitimately start eating more greens.

Caloric restrictions. I didn't really watch my calorie intake this year because I worked on eating 3 meals a day a day while intermittent fasting, and it went well. I think it really helped me, but I want to lose fat this year. Like, I want to dedicate 2025 to that since 2024 was for building habits and fixing bad ones. I will stick to the 12 hour fast and full 3 meals, but I'll add the calorie restrictions (1800 calories) and add a carb limit.

This one is small, but I always think about it. I need to really slow down when I am eating because I usually feel extremely full 30 mins later. It would also help my digestion.

Okay, I am going to discuss the future a little bit. I have decided to renew my contract at USF, and I am going to push back my moving plans too. I decided this was best because I've been working, but I have been spending too. I have not saved properly to move out and live comfortably. I did A LOT of traveling and spending after I graduated. I am planning to travel way way less and spend way way less in 2025 because my savings is not pretty. I also haven't looked for a new job, so I will be doing that in 2025 too.

Overall, I feel like I have had a very GO GO GO kind of year, and I want to spend 2025 on myself. I tried doing that in 2024, but I was just doing shit all the time LOL. I did so some of that with my diet and exercising, but I was pretty bogged down by school. Let's finish 2024 strong and have a good 2025!

-P

[that-punk-adam]

Keegan the husky.

This is our (?) dog, jack/Keegan. He’s an absolute blessing from the doggy distribution system because he’s a husky. If he’s been out of a house sense August (in Ohio), I can’t think of what life was like for him.

Keegan is so skinny. You can feel most of his bones. He is the most kind dog, the definition of a sweet heart. He smells like death but that literally doesn’t stop me from loving every boney inch of him. He’s finally in a place that will love and care for him as much as we possibly can.

He is unchipped but was thankfully neutered, so he doesn’t have offspring running around that we know of. He’s a young adult, around 2 years old. He has a very slight limp and, obviously, has had no checkups or health stuff done.

But, my god, he is a sweetheart. Such a good boy. So far, he’s been great with the people he’s gone into contact with. He can eat out of your hand. He’s calm when you open the door (though he does look). He wants to be by my side, probably because he thinks he’s going to get abandoned again.

Keegan might get put to sleep. Though the shelters around here are “no kill”, they don’t have the staffing and specialties required to make sure he gets the care he needs- to make sure he gains weight, his poops are solid, has no worms, no cancer/tumors, etc. The shelters would take him if he was in better shape. If it was a simple thing like needing a dewormer or vaccines because he would be a surrender, then sure! But he is skinny. His is my whole heart right now.

For right now, he’s resting on the floor as I type this out. His breaths are even and quiet. He’s calm and at my feet. I have to wait to see what will happen tomorrow morning. I just started a new job but the money won’t come in until later. I want so bad to fight for this poor dog that’s been through hell. Keegan is a great dog, please send him good vibes.

[frogsandfries]

Good evening flight 922, this is your depression speaking

Last night, my sister was talking about suspecting that she might be pregnant. Maybe I was out of line, but I'd be more than happy to raise it for her. She said, it's my body--at this point, that would be beyond relevance, seeing as she suspects she'd be about seven months. I took that as her implying she'd be giving it up for adoption to total strangers. Which is totally antithetical to her whole mission, which is trying to get kids OUT of the foster system. Just give the kid to me and pretend you're the aunt. Have nothing to do with the child, if you like. There is literally no sense in giving the child to strangers when you have family that would take on the task with pride and determination.

She told me that I've got enough to deal with, what with not having a job, and I couldn't even take care of it because of my depression. Look, I don't do the job to her standards, which is fine, because she is totally available to come behind me and accomplish her standards herself, but I essentially take care of this entire house. I'm here all the time. I know everything about this house--I know what's up with the dishes and garbage and the cats and guinea pigs. Yes it's a lot already. I'm not the one who brought home four kittens, instead of just two, but why not just pile a baby on top?

I'm just going to keep dwelling on this because, even though during our relationship, my ex kept talking up my parenting potential, I don't think they ever said outright that they thought I'd be a good parent (although, I mean, what is the opinion of a child predator on what's a good parent is); and as a last, weak attempt at a blow to my ego, they did say they didn't think I deserved or had any right to be a parent.

Even my only irl friend, while she has said at points, she thinks I'd make a great parent, when discussing my actual ability to become a parent, her saying maybe it's just not meant to be because of my body felt to me like a retraction of her past positivity.

I'm not expecting a baby to necessarily fix my life.

I don't think people understand.

I don't think people understand what harm-based OCD is like. The term for it only came to my attention within the last couple of years. It's fucking terrifying that all you can think about when you spend time around children just a couple years younger than you, is all the ways they can be hurt. And you can't shut it off, even though that's the last thing you want to do to anyone.

I don't think people understand what it's like to think that you're a fucking monster and you should never have anything to do with children. I don't think people understand what it's like to feel like the having children option feels chosen for you.

I don't think people understand what it's like to then have the option further solidified for you by your garbage body, while you watch people with worse health than yours, with the same conditions as your body has, have their own children.

And to treat them worse than you could ever imagine treating a child ever, period.

I don't think anyone in the world will understand what it's like to have doctors shrug their fucking shoulders and be like, just try IVF. DO YOUR FUCKING JOB AND FIND OUT WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME!!

Oh, poor little meow meow, she's so speshul no one will ever understand what it's like to be her, no one will ever understand how hard her life is.

Look, I know there are other people out there with harm based OCD.

I know there are other people out there struggling with infertility.

I know there are other people who leave the doctor and need to scream and cry because "oh I guess there's nothing wrong with you, you must be hysterical and/or faking it for attention".

I know there are children in the foster system who need homes and families and stability and an adult to fucking be there for them.

I know that.

And I can't........I just can't be part of that system. My participation is not going to change the system. And no one will ever look at me and say, oh yeah, she's definitely fit to be a foster or adoptive parent. Y'know, unmarried/single and so many mental health issues, she can't hold down a fucking job for more than a year.

Anyway, my depression wants me to really fucking know how unworthy I am to be an aunt, or a parent. I'm finding it hard to tell my depression to shut the fuck up because this is the second day in a row that it has rained and been gloomy all fucking day and I've been off my brain drugs and my blood pressure drugs for like, a month or two, and I don't even have my establishing appointment with my doctor till fucking late mid October.

I keep thinking, I should ask the doctor to give me an MRI or CT or something on my brain, which has never been done, because I genuinely think there's something physically wrong with my brain.

Also, there is never going to be a weight that my body will be that the doctors will finally be like, huh, she's a healthy weight, physically fit, eats well, still doesn't have a natural period; maybe we need to intervene further.

Additionally, I just want to point out, the US American health system is entirely how I got to this point. This capitalist system is how my physical health issues got so bad; I went years uninsured and under insured because I fucking could not afford it and you have no idea how much that makes me want to scream. Leaving off the fact that, despite dreaming what feels like a lot lately about screaming, I'm not positive I actually can anymore.

[2bpoliticallycurious]

3. “The whole MAGA cult is just very frightening to every sane person.”

“As a European watching this and other elections, it continues to blow my mind how fragile your system seems to be. There is a lot that's wrong in politics where I'm from, but I fully trust our democratic process, at least, and have never once thought about anything other than my own choice when voting. The whole Electoral College thing making geography the deciding factor over which vote is important? The gerrymandering, the costs of campaigns, the different rules in different states, the voter registration, the differing circumstances under which you cast your ballots, and how they are ultimately counted. 

People are being intimidated on their way to the booth, it's sometimes difficult to keep your vote secret or to avoid being influenced in the voting place, partisan people might count votes and confirm the results... Seems like the system invites malfeasance.”

—Hana, Germany

4. “It’s scary that Trump has been able to brainwash half a nation using fear and division… and can still be taken seriously in this day and age, especially in one of the world's largest economies.”

Sony Pictures Entertainment/Zombieland / Via youtube.com

—dantruemanmail, England

5. “I have so much anxiety over this election.”

“I know what it will mean for our world if Trump gets in, and it’s terrifying. I’m also pretty horrified that he has so many supporters. How can they not see he’s another Hitler?”

—nostalgicmug67, Australia

10. “We’re laughing, but also crying.”

“I’m very nervous about what could happen on a global scale. The man has constant temper tantrums and nuclear codes — great combo. That and a dictator's ambition. I’m very worried for the world. And I’m laughing at Trump supporters. People that stupid shouldn’t be allowed to vote."

—Eileen Bouman, Netherlands

12. “As a non-American who moved here last year —from the UK— I'm constantly disappointed and surprised at the extent to which people —on both sides (but more so on the Trump one)— simply do not listen to each other or care about facts.”

“People will happily repeat things they've heard that have either been proven false, or are literally impossible — and state it as if it's a legitimate reason to have their opinion.  

I find it terrifying that the impact of statements is entirely down to the statement, and not whether it's actually true. People seem to have deliberately, willingly switched off their capacity to weigh evidence and make decisions based on it. Instead, they form an opinion and choose which 'evidence' supports it, happy to pick things that are made up, or simply wild conspiracy. It feels like everyone's reverting to a time before things were actually checkable. The one glimmer of hope is that most people —even those who claim to hold abhorrent, bigoted views based on lies— seem not to act on those views when it comes to one-on-one interaction. So I guess...everyone hates everyone, but not in person?”

—Jamey, United Kingdom (via Los Angeles)

23. “I think America has gone completely insane.”

Drazen Zigic / Getty Images

“As a woman, it hurts even more to know that over 70 million Americans voted for a man who brags about his sexual assaults on women. It is genuinely baffling to watch from abroad. I wish Americans could understand that the entire world is affected by the U.S. president. We are all going to suffer from the climate crisis, and the people of Palestine and Ukraine are completely f-cked. This will also affect funding for women's health in developing nations. It's a disaster all around. I'm angry…and honestly completely f-cking furious with everyone who voted for this dangerous liar. If America wants to flush itself down the toilet, that's up to them, but you'll take us all with you.”

—Hannah, Scotland

24. “I dunno what's going on in Americans’ heads.”

“At this point, I just think Americans like him. They like that he's a felon; that he gets away with basically everything; that he's a rapist; vulgar; crude; a liar; that he screws over people who worked for him; that he's going senile. They have all the info they need on him. We all do. And they like him. He reflects American values. I didn't believe that after he won the first time. People hated Hillary and didn't really know him. But now? I just think he reflects that vast majority of Americans.”

—Anonymous, Canada

25. And finally, “Your elections are insane.”

Dougberry / Getty Images

“The electoral system is nuts. Donald Trump ‘won’ the 2016 election by getting fewer votes than his opponent. Stephen Colbert, who I think is a generally smart and self-aware guy, referred to America being ‘the greatest democracy in the world’ whilst discussing an election where the candidate who got fewer votes won. That is not a hallmark of a great democracy. Also, if you want foreigners not to have opinions on your elections, you need to stop referring to POTUS as ‘the leader of the free world.’ As a resident of the free world (UK), I have some thoughts.

I'd also like to add that I don't think our electoral system is any better. Our current government got a huge majority by getting just over a third of the vote. That's silly. But I don't claim it's the best country in the world either."

—EdwardJeff, United Kingdom

Contrary to the propaganda spewed on the right, Trump is NOT considered a strong, respected leader around the world. Rather, he is considered a corrupt, mercurial, unhinged, regressive, far-right politician whose impact on the U.S. and the world will be destructive.

Most of the world thinks LESS of America because Trump was voted into office.

Still, I wish the world (and Trump) realized the 2024 vote did NOT reflect all or even most Americans preferences. According to US News & World Report, That's because about 89 million or 36% of the 245 million Americans who were "eligible to vote" DIDN'T vote in 2024.

Today (11/17/24) with 152.4 million (98.1%) of the votes counted, 76.4 million (or 50.1%) voted for Trump--only 2.7 million more than the 73.7 million who voted for Harris.

Leaving the roughly 2.6 million votes that haven't been counted yet out of the equation, that would mean that roughly 31.5 % of eligible voters voted for Trump in 2024.

So basically less than a third of eligible American voters elected Trump. That is hardly a "mandate," and hardly representative of the American people.

But because more than a third of Americans sat out this election, a minority of right-wing Republicans and low-information "Independents" have sold our country down the drain to neofascism--mostly because the price of eggs was too high--leaving most of the world shaking their heads in disbelief.

Foreigners are better informed about US politics than half of Americans.